Darwin Award Thread

[AzScorpion]

I can't believe they actually agreed to "load" that..... That seems like a lawsuit waiting to happen.

I think it's a really good photoshop job. No way that roof could hold half that weight.

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[RedlandRanger]

I think it's a really good photoshop job. No way that roof could hold half that weight.

It doesn't look like the forks have taken the weight fully off it yet. I'd guess if you did, those springs would just crumble - or the roof of the car would just collapse - probably the latter. That is a LOT of weight.

I can just see the forklift guy saying "are you REALLY sure?"

If it is a photoshop job it is a good one.

 

[AzScorpion]

It doesn't look like the forks have taken the weight fully off it yet. I'd guess if you did, those springs would just crumble - or the roof of the car would just collapse - probably the latter. That is a LOT of weight.

I can just see the forklift guy saying "are you REALLY sure?"

If it is a photoshop job it is a good one.

The forks alone would destroy the roof once dragged across let alone the weight of the drywall. lol I know there's a lot of let's just say "not so brilliant people" out there now but seeing as it's Lowe's I tend to believe this is photoshopped.

I've seen (and have) some really good photoshop jobs but I can't post them here or I'll have to ban myself.

 

[Fordup]

The rollover protection cage can handle that weight but the tires will pop ?. Hey saved the $50 delivery charge.

Years ago I had a new F250 long bed and bought 2 pallets of pavers. The guy loaded one on and said he couldn't load the second because they were 3800 pounds each and my truck was sagging. I told him I wasn't making 2 trips so unload the one and give me a refund. We'll that changed his mind and he pushed the first pallet forward then grabbed the second. I knew once it hit the bumpstops there was no limit but as he lowered the second on the back the front bumper went up a foot ?. Slow drive home that day but no problems with real 10 ply tires at 100 psi and full floater rear end. That was an awesome truck with a 460 that could pull anything. Next trip back the forklift driver ran and hid in the back when I walked in the store.
I think my heaviest load was over a full pack of 5/8 fire code sheet rock.

 

[HeatXfer]

A quick estimate: about 21 4x8 sheets of ½" (?) @ about 60#s each comes to, approximately, 1200#s. I don't think Preuses (Prii?) are rated for half-ton loads.

 

[TJC]

I think it's a really good photoshop job. No way that roof could hold half that weight.

I zoomed in 300% and looked for artifacts... didn't see any, but the image is low quality making it easier to mask.

 

[AzScorpion]

Hey, At least he has the wheels chocked.

 

[Motorpsychology]

This showed up third hand on Stromtroopers.com, a site dedicated to owners of Suzuki V-Stroms- thanx to member Jettawreck. Grab a coffee and be amazed:

Taken from "another" motorcycle forum.
2024 Darwin Award Nominations

1.) A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his sister.

2.) Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles.

3.) A 22-year-old, Glade Drive, Reston, VA, man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped one end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. "The length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground," Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was "Major trauma."

4.) A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend, no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate, was hospitalized.

5.) Employee in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell of a gas presumed a leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building extinguishing all potential sources of ignition: lights, power, etc. After the building had been evacuated, two "technicians" from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of the lighter like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of the warehouse up to three miles away.

Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter, being at the exact center of the resulting mêlée, was virtually untouched by the explosion. The "technician" suspected of causing the blast, had never been thought of by his peers as "all there."

And the Winner:

6.) Based on a bet by the other members of his golfing threesome, Everett Sanchez tried to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course. Proving once again that beer and testosterone are a bad mix, Sanchez managed to straddle the ball washer and dangle his scrotum in the machine. Much to his dismay, one of his buddies upped the ante by spinning the crank on the machine with Sanchez's scrotum in place, thus wedging them solidly in the mechanism. Sanchez, who immediately passed his threshold of pain, collapsed and tumbled from his perch. Unfortunately for Sanchez, the post of the ball washer was more than strong enough to support his body weight, and his sack was the weakest link. Sanchez's scrotum was ripped open during the fall, and one testicle was plucked from him forever and remained in the ball washer, while the other testicle was compressed and flattened as it was pulled between the housing of the washer, and the rotating machinery inside. To add insult to injury, Sanchez then broke a new $300.00 graphite shaft driver that he had just purchased from the pro shop, and was attempting to use as a cane. Sanchez was rushed to the hospital for surgery, and the remaining threesome was asked to leave the course.

This last one wouldn't normally count, because the golfer didn't die. But because he cannot reproduce as a result of his qualifying act of stupidity, we have allowed it.

 

[AzScorpion]

This showed up third hand on Stromtroopers.com, a site dedicated to owners of Suzuki V-Stroms- thanx to member Jettawreck. Grab a coffee and be amazed:

Taken from "another" motorcycle forum.
2024 Darwin Award Nominations

1.) A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his sister.

2.) Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles.

3.) A 22-year-old, Glade Drive, Reston, VA, man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped one end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. "The length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground," Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was "Major trauma."

4.) A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend, no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate, was hospitalized.

5.) Employee in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell of a gas presumed a leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building extinguishing all potential sources of ignition: lights, power, etc. After the building had been evacuated, two "technicians" from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of the lighter like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of the warehouse up to three miles away.

Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter, being at the exact center of the resulting mêlée, was virtually untouched by the explosion. The "technician" suspected of causing the blast, had never been thought of by his peers as "all there."

And the Winner:

6.) Based on a bet by the other members of his golfing threesome, Everett Sanchez tried to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course. Proving once again that beer and testosterone are a bad mix, Sanchez managed to straddle the ball washer and dangle his scrotum in the machine. Much to his dismay, one of his buddies upped the ante by spinning the crank on the machine with Sanchez's scrotum in place, thus wedging them solidly in the mechanism. Sanchez, who immediately passed his threshold of pain, collapsed and tumbled from his perch. Unfortunately for Sanchez, the post of the ball washer was more than strong enough to support his body weight, and his sack was the weakest link. Sanchez's scrotum was ripped open during the fall, and one testicle was plucked from him forever and remained in the ball washer, while the other testicle was compressed and flattened as it was pulled between the housing of the washer, and the rotating machinery inside. To add insult to injury, Sanchez then broke a new $300.00 graphite shaft driver that he had just purchased from the pro shop, and was attempting to use as a cane. Sanchez was rushed to the hospital for surgery, and the remaining threesome was asked to leave the course.

This last one wouldn't normally count, because the golfer didn't die. But because he cannot reproduce as a result of his qualifying act of stupidity, we have allowed it.

One good thing that comes from this is that they'll never reproduce again. ?‍

#4...Tracy @Tracy Bowman, friends or relatives? ?

#6...Tell me that every guy here while reading this one didn't wince and feel the pain.

 

[Tracy Bowman]

One good thing that comes from this is that they'll never reproduce again. ?‍

#4...Tracy @Tracy Bowman, friends or relatives? ?

#6...Tell me that every guy here while reading this one didn't wince and feel the pain.

If so, I don’t claim them!??

 

[got3fords]

Using the curb to stay in the lane.

 

[HeatXfer]

One good thing that comes from this is that they'll never reproduce again. ?‍

#4...Tracy @Tracy Bowman, friends or relatives? ?

#6...Tell me that every guy here while reading this one didn't wince and feel the pain.

Yeah, but ol' 'uno cacahuente' can still adapt and teach by example. Never underestimate the power of stupid.

 

[AzScorpion]

I can see this happening.

 

[Cmar]

If so, I don’t claim them!??

Yep I'm pretty sure he was teed off!

 

[AzScorpion]

What could go wrong?

At least he has a rope tied to it for safety. lol

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