How about some Jokes [Admin: No Politics, Religion, Nudity, Explicit Posts]

[9zero1790]

A woman was shopping at the local supermarket where she selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk,
A carton of eggs,
A quart of orange juice,
A head of lettuce,
A 2 lb. Can of coffee and
A 1 lb. Package of bacon

A drunk man standing behind her watched as she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out.

While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated -- 'You must be single.'

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but was intrigued by the derelict's intuition since she was indeed single.

She looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about the selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she asked, 'Yes you are correct. But how on earth did you know that?'

The drunk replied -- 'Cause you're ugly.'

im gonna have to use that one i love it!

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[AzScorpion]

For those younger people here that want to borrow Great Grandpa's sedan...

Best anti-theft device out there. ?

 

[Trigganometry]

they need to know about that vent window too! i miss those.

High beam switch is the real wtf is the high beams!

 

[samsd]

Cars back then were designed to have airflow, the wings plus they had fresh air vents. My dad had a 64 Ford wagon, no air, we drove it to Florida in the summer and I being the youngest rode in the very back. Packed a picnic lunch and ate at a roadside rest area.

 

[Radioman]

High beam switch is the real wtf is the high beams!

The high beam switch is on the floor as is the starter switch..

 

[Metal Geezer]

For those younger people here that want to borrow Great Grandpa's sedan...

Sweet. Let ‘em figure out that 3rd pedal themselves.

 

[Trigganometry]

 

[9zero1790]

High beam switch is the real wtf is the high beams!

i miss the foot control for high beams. it was more satisfying to stomp that thing down when someone didnt dim the lights coming at me than the lil wimpy stalk pull push. kinda like slamming a phone down. that rough clank and action added emphasis. on the old rotary phone, if you really gave it a slam down the person on the other end got a brief hint of the bell being shook around before the line was cut. now we lightly tap the touch screen and the mood just isnt portrayed.

 

[Bob902]

 

[Doc]

 

[Trigganometry]

 

[Bob902]

 

[AdamHarris]

 

[Metal Geezer]

A woman was shopping at the local supermarket where she selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk,
A carton of eggs,
A quart of orange juice,
A head of lettuce,
A 2 lb. Can of coffee and
A 1 lb. Package of bacon

A drunk man standing behind her watched as she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out.

While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated -- 'You must be single.'

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but was intrigued by the derelict's intuition since she was indeed single.

She looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about the selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she asked, 'Yes you are correct. But how on earth did you know that?'

The drunk replied -- 'Cause you're ugly.'

Sounds like a Foster Brooks sketch. Google it kids.

 

[AdamHarris]

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