AzScorpion
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- First Name
- Dave
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- Jul 25, 2019
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- #16,486
Ok, last one but there's just so many good Chuck Norris jokes.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t worry about high gas prices. His vehicles run on fear.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t need to flush his toilet; he just looks down and scares the sh*t out of it.
- Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to season his meat.
- When Chuck Norris turned 18, his parents moved out. **This is my favorite one. lol
- When Chuck Norris cooks, he makes the onion cry.
- Chuck Norris plays Jenga with Stonehenge.
- When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror, the mirror shatters. Because not even glass is dumb enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris
- The flu gets a Chuck Norris shot every year.
- Chuck Norris can dribble a bowling ball.
- Ghosts sit around campfires and tell Chuck Norris stories
- Chuck Norris doesn’t do push-ups; he does Earth downs.
- Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
- Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience.
- Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird.
- In the Beginning, there was nothing. Then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.
- Chuck Norris got bitten by a rabid dog. He didn’t get sick; the dog got better.
- When Chuck Norris jumps in the water, he doesn’t get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t eat honey; he chews bees.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t call the wrong number. You pick up the wrong phone.
- Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best damn lemonade you’ve ever had.
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