How about some Jokes [Admin: No Politics, Religion, Nudity, Explicit Posts]

[FX4Offroad]

Well, I scored 17 so I guess I'm Older Than Dirt.

Boy I remember growing up and getting drunk on Boone's Farm Tickle Pink wine. lol

13 for me...but I was a teenager in the 70's. I'm just happy to remember anything.

Sex, drugs and rock & roll man!

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[FX4Offroad]

I used to play (pretend) Johnny Quest with my brother & cousin when I was little. We stayed outside all day. Only came home (or inside) at mealtime & bedtime.

My "pretend play" was the Wild Wild West.

I was James West and my buddy John was Artimus Gordon.

We still talk about it.

RIP Robert Conrad

 

[Bart]

I feel so young in this forum. Class of 04.

I believe that I am the youngest person on this forum, class of 2015.

 

[caprtaineddie]

12 here. Definitely older than dirt (but I love it!)!

Man, I'm really old. I can remember ice being delivered for my grandmother's icebox.

 

[11 r150]

I can remember everything on the list. We had milk delivery & you had to remember to bring it in off the porch in the winter. Frozen milk bottles were a big mess. One quickie, what did the lesbian frog say to the other one? I guess we do taste like chicken.

 

[Dr. Zaius]

What do you call a lesbian with 4 girlfriends?

A Bush hog.

 

[FX4Offroad]

Hope this isn't insensitive. Just thought it was funny

 

[FX4Offroad]

So true

 

[egilbe]

https://www.oreillyauto.com/flux-capacitor?q=121g

 

[Dr. Zaius]

 

[Toytec]

While at the supermarket the other day looking over the picked over meat section I happen to notice a young girl about 12 looking at me.
Then she says from a distance, "the cheap meat is all that's left." I said, "what's over there?"
She said "deer balls, they're under a buck!" and then ran off.

 

[AzScorpion]

*Wife Missing?*

*The first thing a grieving husband should do.......CALL THE SHERIFF!!!*

Husband: My wife of 15 years is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home !
Sheriff: Height ?
Husband: I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
Sheriff: Weight ?
Husband: Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.
Sheriff: Color of eyes?
Husband: Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.
Sheriff: Color of hair?
Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can’t remember.
Sheriff: What was she wearing ?
Husband: Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.
Sheriff: What kind of car did she go in?
Husband: She went in my truck.
Sheriff: What kind of truck was it ?
Husband: A 2016 Brilliant Diesel Grey Pearlcoat Ram Limited 4X4 with 6.4l Hemi V8 engine ordered with the Ram Box bar and fridge option, led lighting, backup and front camera, Moose hide leather heated and cooled
seats, climate controlled air conditioning. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, Weather Tech floor mats. Trailing package with gold hitch, sunroof, DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio, Cobra 75 WX ST 40-channel CB radio, six cup holders, 3 USB port, and 4 power outlets.
I added special alloy wheels and off-road Toyo tires. It has custom retracting running boards and under-glow wheel well lighting.
At this point the husband started choking up.

Sheriff: “Take it easy sir, we'll find your truck!!!”

 

[Msfitoy]

COVID-19! I can't post there but I sure the hell can here ?

Wooot!!!!

 

[FX4Offroad]

*Wife Missing?*

*The first thing a grieving husband should do.......CALL THE SHERIFF!!!*

Husband: My wife of 15 years is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home !
Sheriff: Height ?
Husband: I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
Sheriff: Weight ?
Husband: Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.
Sheriff: Color of eyes?
Husband: Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.
Sheriff: Color of hair?
Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can’t remember.
Sheriff: What was she wearing ?
Husband: Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.
Sheriff: What kind of car did she go in?
Husband: She went in my truck.
Sheriff: What kind of truck was it ?
Husband: A 2016 Brilliant Diesel Grey Pearlcoat Ram Limited 4X4 with 6.4l Hemi V8 engine ordered with the Ram Box bar and fridge option, led lighting, backup and front camera, Moose hide leather heated and cooled
seats, climate controlled air conditioning. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, Weather Tech floor mats. Trailing package with gold hitch, sunroof, DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio, Cobra 75 WX ST 40-channel CB radio, six cup holders, 3 USB port, and 4 power outlets.
I added special alloy wheels and off-road Toyo tires. It has custom retracting running boards and under-glow wheel well lighting.
At this point the husband started choking up.

Sheriff: “Take it easy sir, we'll find your truck!!!”

SOOOOO true!

 

[AzScorpion]

COVID-19! I can't post there but I sure the hell can here ?

Wooot!!!!

How in the world did you get yourself banned?

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