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How about some Jokes [Admin: No Politics, Religion, Nudity, Explicit Posts]

Dr. Zaius

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AzScorpion

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BDoc

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AzScorpion

AzScorpion

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Dave: "Do I have room to store that tractor? Oh hell, I'll MAKE room!"

Wait, that's probably already in your garage, isn't it?

:LOL:
Some of the old timers drive golf carts around here...Not me! ?

I'll let you borrow it for a few months if you want Bryan? I'll bet your wife will be ok with you buying that RI 1911 when she sees this thing pull up. lol ;)
 

P. A. Schilke

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Some of the old timers drive golf carts around here...Not me! ?

I'll let you borrow it for a few months if you want Bryan? I'll bet your wife will be ok with you buying that RI 1911 when she sees this thing pull up. lol ;)
Hi Dave,

I was one of these old farts with a golf cart when I arrived here in Green Valley in 2005. So I eliminated governor and increased the compression ratio of the one lunger motor, changed the rear axle gearing and made a rocket (for a golf cart) out of it. I got pulled over by the Pima County Sheriffs for doing 43 mph in the golf cart/bicycle lane. Way too fast for a flippin' golf cart, eh? Sheriff was simply amazed by the speed. I told him I was a former racecar driver an wanted to hotrod my golf cart. His advice was "cool it!" to which I said "yes Officer". Sold it shortly afterwards. Contemplated installing a twin cylinder Brigs and Stratren motor, but gave up the idea. No house at the time and limited tools in the RV park...

Best,
Phil Schilke
Ranger Vehicle Engineering
Ford Motor Co. Retired
 

P. A. Schilke

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Hi Folks,

Okay...true story...

My Dyson hand led Vacuum quit and blinked an error code. I called customer service that decoded the blinks to say my battery was shot. They offered me a new improved Dyson and would throw in a battery for the old vacuum with the purchase. They would price match Costco but needed to determine my needs. I was looking at a V10 and they wanted me to upgrade to "Animal" I told them I did not need Animal. So here is the conversation.

Um...Mr Schilke...do you have any pets

Me" Yes

Um...is it a dog or a cat?

Me...no

Okay what kind of pet do you have?

Me...Sonoran Desert Tortoise.

Long pause... Tortoies?

Me. Yes Tortoise.

Um....does this Tortise shed?

It went down hill from there.....Sheesh!

Best,
Phil Schilke
Ranger Vehicle Engineering
Ford Motor Co. Retired
 

caprtaineddie

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Hi Dave,

I was one of these old farts with a golf cart when I arrived here in Green Valley in 2005. So I eliminated governor and increased the compression ratio of the one lunger motor, changed the rear axle gearing and made a rocket (for a golf cart) out of it. I got pulled over by the Pima County Sheriffs for doing 43 mph in the golf cart/bicycle lane. Way too fast for a flippin' golf cart, eh? Sheriff was simply amazed by the speed. I told him I was a former racecar driver an wanted to hotrod my golf cart. His advice was "cool it!" to which I said "yes Officer". Sold it shortly afterwards. Contemplated installing a twin cylinder Brigs and Stratren motor, but gave up the idea. No house at the time and limited tools in the RV park...
Back in my cycling days, I was stopped for going 35 in a 25MPH zone.
Best,
Phil Schilke
Ranger Vehicle Engineering
Ford Motor Co. Retired
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