How about some Jokes [Admin: No Politics, Religion, Nudity, Explicit Posts]

[Dr. Zaius]

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[Dr. Zaius]

 

[Dr. Zaius]

A guy goes to City Hall to apply for a job.

The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"

He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee."

"OK, have you ever been in the military service?"

"Yes," he says. "I was in Iraq for one tour."

The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment."

Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"

The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles."

The interviewer grimaces and then says, "Okay. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. You can start tomorrow at 10 a.m. and plan on starting at 10 a.m. every day."

The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., why don't you want me here until 10 a.m.?"

"This is a government job," the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."

 

[AzScorpion]

 

[Metal Geezer]

Margaret Thatcher Only??

I’ll collectively interpret those reactions as “huh??
Google “Margaret Thatchers nickname” kids…

 

[AzScorpion]

 

[AzScorpion]

I had a girlfriend who would trowel on her makeup like that. The first time I woke up and saw her without it I thought I was with someone else, she looked like a totally different person. It went well with her 6 different personalities.lol.

 

[AzScorpion]

 

[Motorpsychology]

Family joke;
Kristi has a problem with any red foods-taco sauce, Ragu, BBQ sauce, etc so she will often take an antacid ahead of time if she knows there'll be red food served.

Her go-to is that Italian heartburn med:

We pronounce it,
ōhm-ay-prrrah ZOH -lay!

 

[Chris M]

Family joke;
Kristi has a problem with any red foods-taco sauce, Ragu, BBQ sauce, etc so she will often take an antacid ahead of time if she knows there'll be red food served.

Her go-to is that Italian heartburn med:

We pronounce it,
ōhm-ay-prrrah ZOH -lay!

Jeanie has stock in that company by now...

 

[Dr. Zaius]

 

[Dr. Zaius]

 

[Dr. Zaius]

 

[AzScorpion]

 

[Dr. Zaius]

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