How about some Jokes

Discussion in 'Chat Lounge For Off-Topic Discussion' started by AzScorpion, Feb 14, 2020 at 11:35 AM.

  1. Msfitoy

    Msfitoy Well-Known Member

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    you're too fast for my edits :crackup:
     
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  2. OP
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    AzScorpion

    AzScorpion Well-Known Member

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    The Pastor's Ass

    The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won !!


    The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey
    that he entered it in the next race, and it won that race too.


    The local paper read:

    PASTOR'S
    ASS OUT FRONT.

    The Bishop was so upset with this kind of
    publicity that he ordered the Pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.


    The next day the local paper headline read:

    “BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S
    ASS”.


    This was too much for the Bishop, so he
    ordered the Pastor to get rid of the donkey.


    The Pastor decided to give it to a Nun in a
    nearby convent.


    The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:


    NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN!!


    The Bishop fainted ….

    He informed the Nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey as soon as possible.


    So she sold it to a local farmer for $10.
    The next day the paper read:


    “NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10”.


    This was too much for the Bishop so he
    ordered the Nun to buy back the donkey, and take it to the plains where it could run wild.


    The next day the headlines read:

    NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

    The Bishop was buried the next day.


    The moral of the story is .. . . being concerned about public opinion can
    bring you much grief and misery,

    even shorten your life.

    So be yourself and enjoy life.
    Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and
    you'll be a lot happier and live longer!
     
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  3. OP
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    AzScorpion

    AzScorpion Well-Known Member

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    Lol...I just saw your edit and there would definitely be a lot of explosions. :like:
     
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  4. OP
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    AzScorpion

    AzScorpion Well-Known Member

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    Freeloaders on Welfare.JPG
     
  5. Tracy Bowman

    Tracy Bowman Well-Known Member

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    :LOL:
     
  6. Tracy Bowman

    Tracy Bowman Well-Known Member

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    12 here. Definitely older than dirt (but I love it!)!:giggle:
     
  7. Tracy Bowman

    Tracy Bowman Well-Known Member

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    I still have one (rotary phone). Grandson gets a kick out of it.:)
     
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  8. Tracy Bowman

    Tracy Bowman Well-Known Member

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    I used to play (pretend) Johnny Quest with my brother & cousin when I was little. We stayed outside all day. Only came home (or inside) at mealtime & bedtime.:sun:
     
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  9. Tracy Bowman

    Tracy Bowman Well-Known Member

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    Amen, brother!!!:like:
     
  10. gfitzge2

    gfitzge2 Well-Known Member

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    :crackup::crackup: I graduated HS in 69. Being one of six kids we probably kept the milk man in business. I also remember him keeping my mother up to date on my current girlfriends family. He knew every one in the neighborhood. I remember the milk deliveries well so you didn't miss it by much.
     
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  11. gfitzge2

    gfitzge2 Well-Known Member

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    After a little too much one night, from then on I refer to it as "sudden discomfort". :puke:
     
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  12. gfitzge2

    gfitzge2 Well-Known Member

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    I remember the family gathering around our first color TV. The picture was terrible especially just having rabbit ears for an antenna. It got a little better when my dad installed a big ass antenna on the roof with a motor on it so it could be pointed in the right direction depending on which Chanel you wanted to watch. We only had 3. You had to dial it to the right direction with a controller that sat on the TV.

    Here is one. Do you remember Rocky and Bullwinkle and the metal munching mice that descended on earth to gobble up all the TV antennas?
     
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  13. Noel Willhite

    Noel Willhite Well-Known Member

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    Save this and drop on anyone at any time , it’s my favorite and most versatile meme

    B72E4E66-AA86-4496-BC3F-0377AB606F67.jpeg
     
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  14. OP
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    AzScorpion

    AzScorpion Well-Known Member

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    2030 Mustang GT.jpg
     
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  15. Msfitoy

    Msfitoy Well-Known Member

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    And bonus...she' supplies the donkey power :)
     
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