How about some Jokes [Admin: No Covid or Politics!]

[Bob902]

 

[P. A. Schilke]

 

[Fawnbuster]

Maybe she was a retired drug dog and she dug up someone's buried stash

 

[Fawnbuster]

 

[TXRangerTim]

Maybe she was a retired drug dog and she dug up someone's buried stash

It's a malinous. those maligators need a job all the time. Maybe someone dropped a bio bomb in the yard to get back at the neighbors.

 

[Fawnbuster]

It's a malinous. those maligators need a job all the time. Maybe someone dropped a bio bomb in the yard to get back at the neighbors.

Yup, all of our k9s at the SO are malingators, bite, track and drug sniffers.

 

[TXRangerTim]

Yup, all of our k9s at the SO are malingators, bite, track and drug sniffers.

We had maligators along with Dutch and German shepherds. Drugs and people mostly. Not trained to bite but some were defiantly biters. Most of K9s were crazy or OCD.

 

[dtech]

“Forgive me father for I have sinned,” an Irish girl said. “My boyfriend held my hand twice, kissed me three times and made love to me twice.”

“Daughter! Go home, squeeze seven lemons and drink it straight down,” the priest said.

“Will it help?” she asked.

“No, but it will get that silly smile off your face!”

 

[dtech]

Finnegan is drunk as usual. He walks into the church and goes straight to the confessional box.

There is silence. The priest waits for Finnegan to start talking. He waits and waits. Finally, the priest pounds on the wall of the confessional box.

“Ain’t no use in knocking,” Finnegan yells back. “There is no paper on this side, either!”

 

[dtech]

Q: What's an Irish 7-course meal? A: A six pack and a potato.

Q: Whats the difference between an Irish wedding, and an Irish funeral? A: There's one less drunk.



An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?" "Just water," says the priest. The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?" The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again!"

 

[Fawnbuster]

What do you call a drunken Irishman passed out on your lawn?

Patty O'Furniture

 

[9zero1790]

We had maligators along with Dutch and German shepherds. Drugs and people mostly. Not trained to bite but some were defiantly biters. Most of K9s were crazy or OCD.

i think the dogs sense that we humans wanna slap the bad guy sometimes. and being humans best friend just gives the perp a lil chomp for us.

 

[TXRangerTim]

i think the dogs sense that we humans wanna slap the bad guy sometimes. and being humans best friend just gives the perp a lil chomp for us.

Some of our K9s would bite anyone that got too close. There was one black Dutch Shepard that was hard to handle and bit whoever. One of the guys was trying to be funny and told the handler "your dog has a little peepee". He was leaning against the front fender of a Dodge Charger and the K9 and handler were right in front of him maybe 5' away. As soon at he said that the dog lunged right at his crotch. The guy ended up in the middle up the car's hood. Good thing his reaction was as fast as the dog's lunge. Any slower and the dog would have had a mouthful of man nuts.

 

[Synfulz]

We had maligators along with Dutch and German shepherds. Drugs and people mostly. Not trained to bite but some were defiantly biters. Most of K9s were crazy or OCD.

My girl is approaching 10 so overall she's mellow. Except when we walk by the Rottweiler. ??

 

[9zero1790]

Some of our K9s would bite anyone that got too close. There was one black Dutch Shepard that was hard to handle and bit whoever. One of the guys was trying to be funny and told the handler "your dog has a little peepee". He was leaning against the front fender of a Dodge Charger and the K9 and handler were right in front of him maybe 5' away. As soon at he said that the dog lunged right at his crotch. The guy ended up in the middle up the car's hood. Good thing his reaction was as fast as the dog's lunge. Any slower and the dog would have had a mouthful of man nuts.

wow guess the dog knew english words better than expected.